vegas log: days 1 & 2

day one: the vegas flight/airport told me everything i needed to know. not only was my flight filled with people just overjoyed to be Going To Vegas, there was actually applause when we landed (and not because of holy-god-turbulence). i waited for pwowsemaster's plane to land, after which we took a shuttle to our hotel (treasure island, or "ti" as it's now called as it oozes "hip" remarketing). the shuttle was fairly traumatizing, in part because an "embassador" for planet hollywood (a barbie of a woman) spent the entire ride being cheesy and trying to get people to take her tour(s) or buy some sort of discounted tickets ("do you know what nevada's state bird is? the crane!" oh hilarity.). when laura and i went to leave our shuttle and get our luggage, our driver asked for a tip (which i knew i didn't have, and justified seeing as the 15 minute ride was $6 x 16 of us), to which i replied "i'm sorry i don't have any cash" (i was down to big bills and coins) and then was told "bullshit." we walked away slowly while the driver called laura a bitch and used the f-bomb.

welcome to vegas.

but all was redeemed: albertamae was waiting for us outside, and we headed into our (completely awesome/nice/impressive) hotel, got situated, and went out looking for food.

now, i didn't have what i'd call high hopes for vegas, neither as a vegetarian nor a person spoiled by a notoriously foodie town. but i guess i figured it's a tourist city, so there'd have to be (other than the notorious buffets, something i'm only allowed once while i'm here) some ok eatins somewhere. we attempted to eat at bill's wild saloon's victorian room, but found the "chinese" menu and the standard american fare...sketchy. around the corner was battista's italian restaurant, which (upon first approach) seemed quirky and dive-y in a potentially good way--like a bucca di peppo from the 70s--so we gave it a shot. every meal came with free wine, so our table was dressed with a bottle of red, and a bottle of white...but that's pretty much where the magic ended. the food was canned italian style, the cheese tortellini came with meat marinara sauce (which we had to send back), the bread tasted like microwaved texas toast. even sadder was the fact each dinner was basically $23 a person. vegas, don't make me hate you (or is it too late already?)

after dinner we had pretty much embraced potential walgreens/7-11 meals of random produce + pbj sammiches + processed crap (because, really, if you're gonna eat processed crap anyway, might as well eat it for $4 vs. $23). we bought some liquor and snack essentials, headed back to our hotel, got free shots of some liqueur, walked around the strip and the mirage, hung out in the flamingo and a couple other hotels, walkedwalkedwalked.

we discovered that vegas is a dirty, dirty city. after walking all day our feet were black. disgusting.

day two: we three brunettes began our morning in our fancy schmancy hotel pool, then later off to some exploring of the strip, namely seeking H&M. walking southbound on the strip was disgusting--construction blowing dirt, debris, and nudie-girlie playing cards everywhere. H&M was small (shop-sized) and full of summer/80s colors, which was disappointing. we ate at our hotel and, having been in vegas for essentially 2 days, figured we'd give our hand at gambling. albertamae played her hand at texas hold 'em ("this one's for my mama"), i watched, eventually played (and lost) $3 on a marilyn monroe slot and a unicorn penny slot, during which times i got 3ish freeish drinks, and that was good (and the same price or cheaper than just drinking at a bar), but honestly, kind of boring. a girl can only be excited by shimmering unicorns and flashing lights and glittery gold tokens for so long (even me).

before i had even arrived, i was prepared to complain about the weather, but actually the weather was completely gorgeous and passable: 10% humidity on an 85 degree day was completely pleasant. there had been a breeze (or in some cases, gusts of 30 mph), and the sun wasn't oppressive. hilariously, desert/summer weather (usually one of my favorite things to complain about) was the thing i expected to dislike: the nice weather ended up being one of the few positive things i could say about vegas.

vegas log: day 3

day three: the quintessential vegas experience (or as far as what i remember from my first visit in 1990) involves buffets. we knew we couldn't make a habit of it (we three brunettes are lovers of both food and things that are free). mirage hotel offered a brunch buffet that included unlimited bloody marys...and if nothing else, that sounded perfect (in theory). we had terrific service by an adorable older gentleman named court (whom i took a picture with later), but good service and decent food and alcohol that is free and unlimited do not a good idea make. after my fourth plate (i wish i was kidding) and third bloody mary things got uncomfortable, and remained so for many hours to follow. i literally had trouble walking back to our hotel, where (once in our room) i beached myself for a couple hours (and contemplated throwing up very seriously). it passed, i started feeling better, and went for a walk, securing tickets to LOVE (the beatles inspired cirque de soleil show), then gambling a little with albertamae while pwowsemaster hung out at the pool. at this point my money-spent-on-slots was up to about $19. a few more drinks, and then back to the mirage for LOVE... which was so amazingly incredibly impressive, words can't even describe it, so i won't really try. i've been a fan of all cirque performances i've seen, but this one was so moving and beautiful. the show opened with a stripped down (vocals-only) version of "because," (arguably one of my favorite beatles songs), and i was, 10 seconds into it, sobbing. throughout the show and the songs i found myself either transfixed or heart-heavy. i cried through most of the opening bars of the saddest of (lennon) beatle songs. the costumes, set design, choreography, and props were completely amazing ("story line" was more or less non-existent in comparison to other shows i've seen, but not a major complaint). the performers were amazing; i'm re-motivated to look into circus school again (trapeze/aerial acrobatics), which will hopefully start up this fall after a bike-crazy/healthy/active/yoga summer (mama doesn't have what it takes to support her weight on ropes just yet).



after LOVE i was kind of a mess, so i went back to the hotel to regroup, then joined albertamae and pwowsemaster outside to walk around and find something to do. it was a saturday night, and vegas was at it's worst: we hated everyone. highlight (lowlight?) of the night was pwowsemaster sitting on the concrete next to a trash can, smoking and drinking dewars out of a flask. we found a flyer called "when the fun stops"--about gambling addiction, but the brunette lunch club kind of agreed the fun had stopped in vegas after two nights (if not sooner). we were surrounded by basically the worst kinds of people--all tourists, male and female douchebags, women dressed for attention in clothes indistinguishable from whores, the freshly-21, the freshly-married, people covered in designer names and expensive jewelry, you name it. we walked around looking for something to do but everything was essentially the same--more slots and gambling, more overpriced food and drinks, more mass consumerism. we couldn't find anywhere that suited us, so we headed back into our hotel.

later, back at duck stamps slots, i briefly won the only money i might've won in vegas: from 92 cents i won $30something, then $50something, then lost it all. we called it a night.